I am shamefully aware of my avoidant personality issues which cause me to appear aloof and distant to those whom I care about, which includes you. As I have explained in previous posts, I struggle with correspondence triggered anxieties that are a debilitating factor in my everyday existence.
What I would like to do is to thank everyone for their kindness. Specifically, I would like to express my sincere gratitude for a select group of those whose presence I have taken note of in their continual support. These lovely people are so incredibly considerate as to provide their thoughts and opinions which are a crucial source of inspiration to me through their writing and their humanity. [If you click the links it will take you to their sites]
To start with, I wish to thank Jasper Kerkau for bringing me into his family of diversely excellent writers of the Sudden Denouement Literary Collective. His unrelenting kindness and support from early on have paved the way for so much of my expression. Christine Ray is always there to remind me that I’m on the right path. She is a precious soul companion all throughout ephemerality. oldepunk is my source of support that makes me always want to strive for the most honest and respectable work I can muster. I can’t read his words without being affected on a profoundly personal level. I wish to personally thank Jenn Vanessa Just Joan Mark R. Stone JohnCoyote TheFeatheredSleep Chandra Vice Rob Marts Jac Forsyth Aakriti Kuntal Maria Gianni Iannucci Nicole Lyons Bethany Kay Kindra M. Austin ididnthavemyglasseson Alka Rao Amie Sparks anotetohuguette annajenkins yassy Kunstkitchen Gospel Isosceles Chronosfer Felicia Denise Grim’s Crypt Tammy Mezera Truly Unplugged Millie Thom Eugenia Simply Me Katrina K.D. Dowdall InsidiousCravings Jdub jessamayann yagnesthakore Art History Blog ~M joliesattic chris jensen Tyla Smith Thoughts In Life Grand Trines NanMykel djemmand Jon Jade Edge Child of Cynicism livingastanya me Norma Bobb DeanJean curryNcode 10000hoursleft koko boocro ZoolonAudio wrealistwriter weird weekends blog pirate patty wtwijj penpowersong curlygirlabroad AR dievca S Francis Mark Ryan Beauty From Ashes John Robinson TwistedDawn23 Linnet Moss Jeanne janeweightreed10 Samasya Tapasya Mike Miranda Samantha Lucero eyes + words S.K. Nicholas and many others to be added in a future post. All of you are amazing writers and beautiful human beings. Thank you for everything you bring to this world.
Max, or Not 
YOU are wonderful.
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I am honored to be included in your list. You must know that the feeling is mutual. Cosmic fate brought us all together and for that I am forever grateful.
Somehow here in bloglandia I am given “permission” to be the REAL me. Though never officially diagnosed, I have always been anxious and shy. I hid behind my mother every time we went out and somehow people thought me doing so was cute.
I have my moments, ups and downs but if given a choice, I could see myself completely home bound one day. I mean especially now when groceries can be delivered. Even today I skipped out of a retirement celebration for a dear former co-worker because I couldn’t deal. The thought of small talk made me queasy. Now I regret not going but too little to late.
And I ramble, maybe I should have left my blog name alone :). All this and a BIG thank you Max. You ARE one of the good guys.
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As you’d become more aware of these characteristics in your own personalities, you will be more able to change your own behaviors for the better…
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It is a pleasure reading your posts, Max. A lack of response hasn’t change the experience for me- afterall, we read magazines and books without an expectation to engage with the writers. It was a nice surprise though to read this post :)
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You are a beautiful soul and one of the best poets on WP. Love you too, buddy. I hope that you find some peace in your daily struggles. My heart goes out to you.
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This is beautiful!
And I feel privileged to have even encountered your genius self, let alone be a part of this post.
Please don’t feel shame. <3
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My friend you said this SO WELL I think it is so important never to feel shame – least of all someone as lovely as Max but truthfully nobody should feel shame for sadness or sorrow or isolation or pain. xo WELL SAID MY FRIEND!
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Thank you Candice! I truly respect explanations such as Max’s, so that we can all understand more. But to feel shame on top of all of this suffering, just breaks my heart. I hope you don’t either, for the anxiety you said you feel <3
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I think he is very courageous to express this, I know it cannot have been easy, he is lucky to have friends like you, but then so am I!
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Vanessa– you are a beautiful human being.
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Christine! I don’t know what to say. I feel so unworthy of such a generous compliment, but I thank you for it, and to Max too, I am so honoured you think such things!
And I most certainly feel likewise!
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Vanessa, of course you are worthy of such a compliment! You are always spreading love and light on WordPress and we very much appreciate you.
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Haha you know, I just re read my comment, and of course I meant I feel likewise about all of you, not me lol.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
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<3
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Nice list. That took a lot of work to make the links for the names.
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I think I have APD too Max. I get this completely. I believe worth and affection should not depend on being inclusive and fuzzy, i used to, but people are not more genuine when they are fuzzy, they’re effusive, and that’s not the bedrock of sincerity. Give me an aloof honest person any day, we waste a lot of time with platitude and social noise
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You two are always perfectly lovely to me.
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Being avoidant doesn’t usually mean you cannot be lovely it just means you are a little closed off and aloof like Max said, but in his case and others I have known, I find some of the loveliest people can be very hurt and closed and afraid and yet they still have the courage to reach out. It’s a weird dichotomy but I shouldn’t say more because my later comment had some nasty comments made and I don’t want to ‘go there’ but anyway it’s just my ten cents ;)
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True. I fell in love with both of you pretty quickly and have always understood that your friendships are a precious gift.
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As yours is C. Don’t forget that.
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<3
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every circumstance in my life over the past twelve years has fostered this affliction in me. it’s now to the point where it’s pathological and acute. it pervades every aspect of my daily life. i’m so sorry to hear you suffer this too. it’s literally paralyzing. my heart goes out to you. and of course, to Christine as well. Aloof is one of the most common words people use to describe be. that and capricious. i’m curious what your sign is, Candice. and your mbti if you know it
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This breaks my heart. I have struggled with different types of anxiety, but I can only imagine what this must be like for you. I am so grateful you all write and connect with us in this way, and share your lovely poetic voices to add beauty to our lives!
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Sag. INTP? If that exists … It’s been a while. I think circumstances shape this affliction , i doubt it’s often chosen, but what do i know? If it’s pathalogical that makes our human social demands so difficult. I’m not theoretically against the notion of rejecting society and humanity though, it goes against our nature but it can v e a logical response to seeing of the animal kingdom, man has least value and most destruction. Equally, whilst I do believe in helping others and have empathy, i see again and again the value in cutting our losses and waiting for the asteroid. Maybe that makes me sound awful. The troll on your page clearly thought so, that’s one of many reasons social nedu a is jarring. That’s the meaning behind A Jar For The Jarring. I’d not wish it upon you but conversely i believe kogic can lead us away from compassion toward a more pragmatic isolation rejecting the falacy of so much of social discourse. Those who “act” merciful are often the reverse it is ironically the quieter types who appear more sincere, again, just my opinion. Im saved by humor and a nervous knee jerk vivaciousness in forced social settings, both are on my part, insincere covers. What sign are you? I feel all Age of Aquarius saying that what’s your sign
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So, you say that effusive people aren’t sincere or honest? Hm. It never occurred to me that people who would rather be positive, bubbly, or cheerful could be deemed as dishonest. Interesting.
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