Mew’s Purrfect Tail

there once was a kitten
who lived in Great Britain
whose purr could be heard the world round

and all of the kitties
who lived in Miau City
would snicker whilst putting her down

her mum named her Mew
but the “Mew” part was silent
which seemed quite ironic indeed

her purr once commenced
could ne’er be silenced
and all fruit, of its tree, was bereaved

as helpless to purr
at the stroke of her fur
and duly so, dare scratch her chin

in frequencies grand
did resound through the land
all too much to this kitten’s chagrin

the ground would shake fiercely
spurring shrieks ear piercing
and medicine shelves did succumb to its might

and even the stars
could be seen from afar
all atremble as they danced with fright

what seemed so absurd
is how she could be heard
her presence, but that of a feather

but still fear had stricken
the cats and the kittens
which led them to act none the better

and thus they would pull
on her whiskers at school
as they trodded all over her tail

for mercy, she pleaded
Mew’s cries went unheeded
her wishes denied their avail

athwart their location
diametrically stationed
did Kitt E. King fretfully pace

his prized catnip coffers
were locked in his dosser
for what must have seemed a month straight

’til one sleepless evening
as he lay there grieving
a rumble displaced the king’s crown

once perched on his nightstand
arose then a loud clang
as on the king’s head, it rained down

which triggered a notion
should he traverse the oceans
perhaps, he could pinpoint the source

and harness its power
to free his prized flower
by the merit of its stalwart force

then, without hesitation
he set forth, this dire mission
with his fleet of elite Felidae

’til his ships did break ground
in a world upside down
as Mew’s purrs ever beckoned the way

arrived in his palanquin
inciting such a scene
all of Miau City did flock

for ne’er had they witnessed
the Kitt E. King’s visage
and right then their jaws rightly dropped

he stated his case
in a manner post-haste
most aloof, Mew did then acquiesce

then with thunder, they roared
’til the fleet came ashore
in a flurry, the flew to the chest

with nary a flinch
the king scratched Mew’s chin
alas, the king’s fur was undressed!

but Kitt E. King’s face
was alight with elation
transfixed on his unwrested treasure

for quittance he knew
what he simply must do
as he then spied his fur-adorned wall

and he said, “am I daft,
or do I feel a draft?”
and their laughter rang out through the halls

he thusly decreed
with his catnip now freed
to appoint his catswort a new ward

and such Mew became
as she lived out her reign
and her purrs were heard forevermore

[image credit: Luis Wain]

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