Chaotic Pedantry

these, my thoughts
a plague of vague and divergent plagiarizations
indiscriminately pilfered in epic proliferation

culled and culminated
an insipidly loquacious clamor
pulling at the seams
of a precarious defenestrator

sonorous disquietude
of pointless quips methodical
poised with impropriety
imprudently parodical

pondering the response
spurred by unintended implication
posed from every angle
with fastidious consideration

formulating fears quickly forestalled
and then falsely inflected

internalized dialogues
disseminated and dissected

infiltrated by effusively
flourishing fantasies

in fluctuating malformations
of infernal lunacy

frantically then bantering
a bevy of inbound semantics
transmuting juxtapositions
chaotic thought pedantic

poring over every nuance
with a painstaking precision
lamentations
over lingering lexical aberrations

an incessant onslaught
of neurotic errings syntactical
cringing at the notion
of the permanence of erstwhile drivel

ever ready to unravel
by mere random incidence
so unwittingly interweaved
with arbitrary intermittence

why must it be so
that my mind never ceases inundating
every thought that fills my head
with copious neuroticisms

moored and then mechanically mulled over to such mundane measure

maladaptations of mind-numbing malefic discomfiture

omnipresently presaging
prominently ominous

a vomitous slew so profusely foul and insalubrious

besotting of verbosely vulgar surreptitious linguistics
repetitious literary folderal inefficacious

unrelentingly attending all obsessive inclinations
descending into grammatical quandaries sans hesitation

requisitely structured with laborious alliteration
assonance and consonance or else subjective condemnation

were that my implores could ever be expressed externally
surely they would lock me up then quickly throw away the key

cognitive calamity at this degree of grave affliction
begets one naught but a ticket to the mental institution

left bereft of any hope for one’s existential salvation
in an exile of the vilest form of human deprivation

i must then be heedful in revealing my indisposition
if you would excuse me from thus furthering this exposition

Upon Consideration . . .

fuck you
for the thought you’re thinking

fuck your epic pompadour

fuck that smug look
on your fuck face

fuck your doppelganger dog

fuck your every breath you breathe

fuck whatever makes you happy

fuck the way your clothing fits you

fuck the timbre of your voice

fuck anyone desperate
or dumb enough to fall for your shit

fuck you
for not being bothered
by the fact that you’re a prick

fuck your “soul patch”
fuck your soul
fuck your lack thereof
fuck no

fuck the way your mouth moves
every time you make an utterance

fuck your feigned gesticulations

fuck you
just because

fuck the fact that you perceive
yourself as being above others

fuck your lack of self-awareness

fuck the way you mistreat women

fuck your racist undertones
you always try to justify

fuck your privilege
being of a magnitude superlative

fuck your pompous
omnipresent omnipotent arrogance

fuck your vapid elocution
fuck you for always guffawing

fuck your predisposed conclusions

fuck you for wearing “cologne”

fuck you for making me smell you

fuck your insincerity
fuck your insecurity
fuck your lack of verity
fuck your duplicitous nature

fuck you because “~Dashers, Dashers~”

fuck your fucking sweater-vests

fuck you for even existing

fuck you for not remedying it

fuck your parents
fuck theirs too

fuck them all
for never caring

wait a fucking minute, dude –

you too
were neglected

under slightly different circumstances

nonetheless

life had not afforded you
the proper chances

for the record
fuck my hypocritical
lapse in discretion

leading me to perpetrate
a most impetuous transgression

if you would excuse
my hideous affront to civil discourse

mayhaps you and i
could be the source
of one another’s recourse

[image credit: František Kobliha]

memories like these

cruisin’
in a sky blue pinto

nineteen-eighty-six
or so

through the foothills
of tujunga

headed to the old rainbow

pockets emptied
at the castle

somewhere out
in sherman oaks

squandered
trying to conquer strider

level four
was all she wrote

swinging
on the rings
at santa monica
beside the pier

followed by a stop
at woolworths
for some penny candy fare

frantically we’d beg our mom
for change when came the ice cream truck

but when we finally raced outside
most often we were out of luck

garbage pail kids
lik-a-maid
bazooka joe
and pixy-stix

pelon pelo rico
big league chew
and candy cigarettes

gotcha bracelets
vision street wear
swatch watches
and jelly shoes

members only jackets
were the only thing
not neon-hued

weekends when our friends slept over
mischief would soon fill the air

regretting
forgetting
to have chosen truth
instead of dare

helpless
at the mercy
of my older sister’s
bumptious best friend

ceaselessly
accosting me
to follow her
into the old shed

i was far too busy
rocking chopin
on my tape recorder

fostering the nuances
of burgeoning mental disorders

not to mention
perfecting my hand-to-eye coordination

come the day
when playing nintendo
would become my occupation

memories like these
drift through my head
amid the desert twilight

where this heart bleeds cali love
and will until the day that i die

(pictured is myself on the left with my friend David O’Neil at Santa Monica)

Hearsay What?

few exist as piteous
as those swayed
by the plague of hearsay

regaled by despiteous
imposters desperate entreaties

cunningly devised
in ways that play
to every preconception

disarming unwitting parties
of their competent discretion

unbeknownst to whom
would be distraught
with shame by such imprudence

if they could thus comprehend
the gravity of their congruence

sadly, were they to be disavowed
of their misapprehension

consciously their mind would disallow
truth through dissociation

as cognitive dissonance
would pardon their disreputation

safe from any consequence
befitting of their resignation

wont are we as humans
to surrender our hallowed intentions

in spite of our knowing better
still, we submit without question

rather than making the effort
to consider all positions

we would sooner spurn the victim
guilty by their word’s omission

stayed by shame of prohibition
knowing what we dare not mention

so it is that we condemn
those innocent to false convictions

meanwhile, those responsible
for inciting such accusations

revel in the glory
misappropriated by deception

left without a moral
that would suit such an affront to ethics

such truths will perpetuate
for humankind is that pathetic

[image credit: George Cruikshank]

Daydreams

some days
we long to be killed
more than others

to save us
from spilling
our secretive druthers

in rum-soaked confessions
to loathsome ex-lovers

or nameless encounters
with strangers uncovered

shamelessly asking for help
from our mothers

whose salt stings the wounds
from the womb to the gutter

whose ruinous choices
left pagans to shudder

impetuous voicings
so flagrantly uttered

lugubrious lamentations
seethe and smother

you see
i have neither the will
nor the the wanting

to languish in suffering
ever so daunting

i rather prefer
to bestir to the coffin

and slough this infernal coil
right the fuck off then!

[image credit: Edward Honaker]

Eve of No Tomorrow

lay your thoughts
upon my pillow

willows whisper
winds serene

tales unfold
composed of kisses

lost in silent reverie

this night beckons
ever urgent

argent skies
immersed in light

as the stars
succumb to ruin

tranquil drops
well in your eyes

[image credit: Kay Nielsen]

~Fuzzy~ Logic

why
do you not
hear these pleas

to reflect
my state of ruin?

how is it
such words project

inflections
paradoxical?

then,
to hear them
paraphrased

with such aberrant
intonation

altogether bastardizing

every crux
of their intention

what
pray tell
of my expression

disinherits
its avowal

moving you
to mock its merit

feigning ignorance
most foul

that there would
exist displeasure

sourcing
from outside oneself

is by no means
any measure

yours
had thus been
duly shelved

Wanton Predilection

men dare never fathom
of the consequences wrought
in the wake of their ego’s reckless abandon

perhaps it is they know
if such truth were ever sought
they might not feel free to spread their seed at random

for theirs is such a burden
placed upon all womankind
as its sole regard is one based on passing whims

where women take the time
to consider each perspective
a man relates all things back to himself

every woman suffers
at the hand of man’s neglect
though the issues omnipresence e’er obscures

and here we are complacent
thinking this to be the norm
that no credence e’er is paid to our adjures

a man’s flagrant hypocrisy
so garish does it blare
to the point that we no longer recognize it

as women are subjected
to the scrutiny and ire
and are thus condemned to sentences of silence

with all that has been done
every man should build a shrine
at which every night he should beg for forgiveness

but sadly, people scoff
thinking this a vulgar thought
and it seems our species somehow lost its conscience

if man could look beyond
the defenses he has built
in the name of guarding insecurity

to address the endless wrath
he has lain upon his path
and accept his own responsibility

then we might stand a chance
in a world so full of doubt
on this precipice of humankind’s extinction

but all that i have seen
the male ego is as such
’tis beholden to its wanton predilection

Social MEdia

it is such a strange dynamic
these forums in which we gather
in a most persistent state
of idle incoherent blather
trapped behind these glowing screens
the hopes and dreams of every person
air as fleeting as a meme
subjected to flights of aversion
as it seems, the world awaits us
from the very place we sit
boundless escape from our sorrows
hanging at our fingertips
realms of plastic intimacy
ruled by unforgiving whims
wintry hearts that once burned holes
in skies that since have fallen dim
scarcely shedding light on truth
of how quickly we are forgotten
pittances of such regard
leave scars for which no time allots for
in the moment, fools are prone
to bleed expression most effusive
once it passes, who will fill the need
persisting in the ashes
~valiant~, are those who ride
upon a white horse singing freedom
“free” to run their dalliances
soon to show their heart’s deceiving
still, the truth is far more complex
for we all are hapless victims
seeking an escape from our extenuating circumstances
we present personas of our ideal’s interpretation
pandered then to strangers
in an undisclosed remote location
who we treat with no more respect
than we would a pop-up ad
for times we might need some support
when life has left us feeling bad
however, if they fail to answer
in a time we deem respectful
we become annoyed and then consider them to be neglectful
such brazen hypocrisy seems fitting for a generation
raised by television screens
and disenchanted baby-sitters
left without a precedent
of how to treat our fellow humans
honestly, what can we expect
but a state of social ruin
with so many channels of communication ever running
how we manage to engage them all
is truly something stunning
this, of course, is not the case
as countless people are left hanging
whilst we frantically relate
the tales of our spouse’s haranguing
maybe if we placed half as much effort
as we do complaining
into our immediate surroundings
life would be less draining
sadly, there is no foreseeable solution to this issue
therefore, i suggest you grab a box of chocolates
and some tissues

Trust

i have spun this web
with words unsaid
upon a bed of sorrow

love ne’er ebbs
though in her stead
i dread to face
the wakeless morrow

broken vows of death’s departing
spoken with a silver tongue

cloaked in shards
from shattered hearts
enshrouded by the blackened sun

seconds fall at fevered pace
as life does from this land of lust

where all intentions turn to waste
and hurt is what we earn for trusting